Tired…Like, I’m in College and Had a Paper Due By Morning Kind of Tired

Remember when you were in college—or maybe you’re in college now and can TOTALLY sympathize with what I’m about to say—and you knew, for weeks even, that you had a paper due on a specific date, but, like any true visionary, you procrastinated so much that you forgot that it was due until the night before said date? So then you stay up ALL NIGHT and skim through a few books and class notes and then sit at your computer—or laptop—and type until your fingertips are bloody, print out the paper while you’re tossing on some new deodorant and running a comb through your hair, before running out the door to your class. You fly into the classroom, chucking your paper on your professor’s desk, and then sit, completely spent, in your seat in the furthest possible desk from the front of the classroom. Then the professor, like all “great” professors, proceeds to stand in front of the class and drone on and on and on and on…I think you get my drift…about something totally unrelated to your class and it hits you, like an anvil falling from a five story building—BAM—exhaustion has set in. Luckily, for you, the professor finally decides that he or she is finished hearing the sound of his or her own voice and cuts you loose, allowing you to go home and zonk out for an untold amount of time.

Now, how that little rant relates to my current life:

Every day, honestly, is a crapshoot for me in regards to how I am going to feel. It can be the dizziness and never-ending 3 hour tour feeling (read my first entry “Dizzy Comes and Dizzy Goes, if that didn’t make sense to you); it can be the never-ending headache; it could be a nice little mish-mash of the two; or an extra little tid-bit, if you will, could be added to the mix: complete and utter EXHAUSTION! Yesterday I actually ventured outside of the house—did you know that there’s a whole world outside the walls of my home?—and did grocery shopping with my mom. We left the house about an hour after I woke up—which was 10:45—and by the time I got my hind end dressed and little make-up slapped onto this sorry mug of mine, I was ready to go back to bed! I actually slept in the car for the 30 minute car ride from my place to Moreno Valley! Then, once we got into the store it was time to get a wheelchair. Now, understand, when I’m in the stores, I will take down a little old lady to get one of those wheezing electric carts before I go traipsing by foot around the joint! Exercise does a 100 year old body good! C’mon! Ok, I’m TOTALLY joking, my parents raised me better than that, but I think you get my drift.

In all honesty, I told my friend yesterday that I probably would not have been able to kill a half dead fly, THAT’S how exhausted I was. No amount of sleep, aided by drugs (ones given to me by the doctor!) or not, seems to alleviate how tired I am. My physical therapist has told me “go for the caffeine, not the booze”—to which I told her that booze was NOT an issue—so I have been drinking COPIOUS amounts of tea. I have actually, like a pregnant woman that craves ice cream and pickles, been craving iced tea, which my physical therapist said is a good thing because it’s stimulating my brain. Only side effect to it—well, there’s 2, one of which I’m sure you can figure out, tea is a diuretic, ponder it—is that it makes me have a hard time going to sleep, thus these late night blog postings. However, once I’m in bed, I am OUT for the night (most of the time) until 10:30 or later.

I guess the moral of this blog is: if I look drunk, high, or out of it, assume it is the latter of the three choices as I don’t drink or do drugs and just know that whatever it is that is ailing me is making me EXTREMELY tired. I DEFINITELY know that there are people out there in the world who are going through FAR worse things than what I am going through—I’ve totally got things in perspective—but I just wanted to let you in on another little “secret” to this allusive illness of mine.